Friday, November 14, 2008

Life Change

So, I went to church Wed. night. I was convicted as I sat there feeling overwhelmed about so many things. Mostly about time. Feeling I never have any and i can't seem to complete a task even when I try. God spoke to me and said it was my laziness. I'm lazy. Along with being used and abused and taken advantage of. He made it clear to me that if I used my time more wisely and were not lazy then I would have more time to accommodate others needs in addition to ours. Sitting at the computer for many hours a day was not helping matters. The church prayed over me, a friend and another member prayed with me in making our requests known before God. He prayed for specifics and one of them was that I would have wisdom in the use of my time. (what amazes me is that this person didn't know before hand that he was praying for the very thing I was struggling with.)
Thursday morning was spent with God. I had a clear head and it felt as if God was answering prayers and revealing to me exactly what needed to be done. I got up, cut my hubby's hair, got the baby up and dressed, got them both breakfast, and started on the dishes.
Enter, the devil.
Yup, the phone rang. I ignored it and let it go to voicemail. I was on a roll. Nothing was going to stop me, I was going to accomplish much.
10 minutes later the phone rang again. It's the same person calling. I'm thinking o.k., this must be important for them the be calling like this.
Mistake number one. Making an assumption.
Mistake number two. Answering that phone.
Yup, it was someone needing us to tote them someplace. It seems to be a constant around here now. I'm beginning to think the business I need to start is a taxi service company. I've already got clientele. Oh wait, they don't pay!! There is way more to this story regarding all these people calling us to take them places, but I won't go into it with you now. It would take too long.
I hung up the phone and screamed! Yes, I really screamed. A bloodcurdling, keening, "I can't take it anymore" scream. A real one. Sudden Scream
As my panic attack began I thought about one of the ladies who prayed with me. She knew about the current situation and so I called her. What a blessing! She taught me a simple way to say "NO".( a word I can't seem to grasp the concept of for some reason even though saying it more often would make my life so much easier).
Find a secretary. Or just an alternate number you can give out, like your cell phone or something. In my case I don't have a cell phone and no one that I know of who would be willing to take a call for me if I did this. She suggested the pastor's cell phone. Yea, like he doesn't have enough people calling him for useless crap all the time and can take on all the people who call me for useless crap! I called him to see what he thought. What better person to get advice from about prioritizing and time scheduling than a pastor?
More great ideas poured in and I am happy to say I can now say "NO" without being riddled with guilt. I was just feeling like the excuse of "I have to do housework" was a lame excuse to give to someone who has no food and wants to be taken to the store where a manager has offered to donate food to them. Never mind to me that I see a habit being formed among other little red flags going up with these people. Yea, I know, put plastic wrap around my head and paint my body white, I'm a sucker!
So, my outgoing message now explains that until the 21st we are not available unless you have a life or death emergency that you feel we need to be involved with in which case you can call the church number at duh, d,duh,d,duh.
So, my kitchen is completely clean from top to bottom. My dining room table is clean but has papers that need sorted. My laundry is being done as I type. My living room, with a little more work, could possibly be in a magazine for looking nice. My bed is made up with clean sheets and Kea has been bathed and is shining. I'm on the right track. I can feel a change. A life change. And it feels good.
Thank God for good friends that He sends your way to help you with just what you need.

1 comment:

hepsmom said...

Where are you? I tried to reply to the e-mail you sent re: Pampered Chef deal, but my reply was rejected.

I'll try to order something.