Wednesday, February 4, 2009

A binky free home

I'm sitting here typing this and listening to my daughter pathetically whine and "cry" for her binky.

Yea, funny story. We went to the office where she gets check-ups done sometimes. The were processing our paperwork and the woman behind the desk asked Kea for her binky. Kea gave it to her. Yea, gave it over willingly. The woman took it and told her she wasn't getting it back. Kea said, "ok" and took off, Brutus still in hand. I'm thinking to myself, "yea, ok I'll roll with this".
As we prepared to leave, I looked questionably at the woman who took the binky and she slipped it to me. I put it in the bottom of my purse.
I thought, I'm gonna go with this. Kea's teeth are messed up from this stupid binky and she certainly can't suck on it for the rest of her life, I'm gonna stand firm with this.

So, here we go. She asked for it a couple of times. I just keep reminding her she was very kind and gave it to the lady at the office who needed it really bad. It was o.k. for a little while. But now we are home and trying to take a nap which is a crucial binky moment.

It's going about like I figured it would. But, not as bad as I thought it might. I envisioned a screaming child, distraught and unable to be comforted.

Kids aren't as dumb or naive as we think they are. The crescendo just came and went. It was so-so. She has been in her room for an hour kind of whining, doing the whole fake crying thing. Then it hit. She began really crying. That was hard for me. I very nearly gave in. I went to her and guided her back into the bed, gently reminding her again how kind and compassionate she was by giving her only binky to that lady who needed it. I explained to her how much she helped that lady by giving her the binky and how much it helped her out. I reminded her how she got a sticker for being a big girl and giving her binky away and would she like another sticker. She took another sticker and put it in her "I've been good book". I told her she would get another sticker later after she woke up from her nap. But first she would need to lay down and go to sleep with only Brutus(her plush toy dog). She tearfully told me "ok" and laid down. I haven't heard a peep out of her since and that was 10 minutes ago! Praise the Lord, the first part of the journey is passing.

So, my rant now is binky vs. no binky. After this experience I am a believer in no binky ever. Why start it. Why do we start it? Because we parents are lazy and want instant gratification, not even taking our child's future into consideration. Just because we are tired and don't want to hear the whining and crying of the infant, we stick a fake nipple in their mouth to hush them up so we can have what we want. Not even thinking of later on down the road to when the child is addicted. How are you going to take it away? How is the child going to feel? Why not go ahead and suffer through the crying jags now that they won't really remember than yanking a security "blanket" away from them when they've grown up to depend on it?
If I had to do it over I wouldn't have used a binky for Kea.

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